new beginnings

I'm amazed at how my life has changed in the past year.

I'm in awe of where I am today.

Some days I feel confusion, but mostly joy and thanksgiving

I'm married. Yes, on December 17th, 2011 I married the love of my life, Peter Doner. I made the commitment of a lifetime, a covenant with God and with Peter to live life with him, as one, all the days of my earthly life.

I'm learning that where God has me right now in life is exactly where I'm suppose to be. I have made decisions and choices that have brought me here, but ultimately God is in control. I'm learning to simply let go, and trust him. I am now moved out of my parents house forever, which in all honesty was difficult. Living in the same house for my entire life and then moving in with my husband was quite the adjustment. Truth be told, it's still new and I'm still learning what it's like to share pretty much everything.

Married life is one of the most amazing gifts I believe God gave us. To enter into a covenant, a lifelong journey, sharing life with another, enjoying God's gifts, and ultimately serving him together.

Already there are struggles, things unexpected, but that's a part of a new chapter, a new change. That being said, I know already that what is to come in my life will be greater than where I've been. As I trust in the Lord to lead my husband, and lead me, I know he will do exceedingly above what I could hope and imagine.

I believe that's all for now. Just wanted to do a brief update, sharing my thoughts and news.

this i know

always wished, now I accept

I always wished that I was artistic.

That with the stroke of a paintbrush I could paint the images from my imagination on paper

That the world could see and understand the dreams that I dream.

I always wished that I could sketch a friend, a memory, that using a simple piece of lead from a tree I could create a picture of beauty.

I also wished that I had the creativity to use exquisite words and make beautiful poems, expressions of my heart, but I'm just not one of those naturally talented writers.

I can't seem to find the right words to explain or lay out the ideas in my head that long for freedom.

But all this being said, Im not going to stop creating, writing, and pursuing something like having a blog just because I'm not as talented as I'd like to be.

Its okay with me if my words don't always go together, or if the pictures I use don't express what i wish them too.

At least I'm trying to show the world that there's something deeper in me.

Perhaps...maybe this is why playing the piano is ultimately my favorite thing to do.

It expresses that which cannot even be put into words, or painted on a canvas.

It carries a deeper meaning to me, something that takes you to a different level of intimacy when listening or creating.

It's a completely new world and escape for me.

I know that the keys I play and the melodies I create have much more meaning to them than anyone could understand.

Every song I write, every note I play, or key signature I choose is for a reason, a purpose. To express that inside of me that nothing else could express.

Sometimes it's a blessing to acknowledge the gifts and abilities that maybe aren't your strongest because it allows you to see where the Lord has blessed you.

And indeed, each of us are uniquely created by God, with a unique personality, appearance, and set of gifts and abilities to use for his glory.

How I praise him, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

Melody

I wrote this last year. I love the piano. I love music and often it's the only way for me to express that which lies within.

words fail to express

all that you are to me

your love, your mercy, your grace

it floods through me

so iʼll sit here in reverence

with my hands on the keys

Iʼll play for you

a sweet melody

when all else fails Lord

you remain

when everything is fading

you sustain

i cannot speak

of the wonders youʼve done

so iʼll be still and know

that as your bride, youʼll come

iʼll sit here in reverence

with my hands on the keys

iʼll play for you

a sweet melody

only by your grace

and only by your love

am i able to be here

and be called your child.

without you i am nothing

without you iʼll die

but Lord with your mighty love

i find a reason, so i

i cry out to you

with everything i am

as the tears flow down

may the music be my sound

iʼm bare without you

iʼm vulnerable to this world

so tonight O Lord

would you cover me whole

Iʼll sit here in reverence

with my hands on the keys

iʼll play for you

a sweet melody

may the melody of the piano

be pleasing to you Lord

may you bless my hands

as I sit here, expressing my soul

Thank you Jesus for all youʼve done

Iʼll say it again that

my words will always fail

to ever express your unfailing love

Iʼll sit here in reverence

with my hands on the keys

Iʼll play for you

a sweet melody

symphony

symphony.

there was a girl, dark haired and wide eyed

looked at the world, strong willed and unafraid to put up a fight

though she appeared tough on the outside

one look at her and he made up his mind

“I’m yours for life”

one thing led to another

now we’re standing here together

and you’ll still be running by my side

when the world falls to its knees

and we’ll still be dancing when the world has lost

the ability to hear

the symphony

you look at me and I know I’m beautiful

you give me courage to admit when I am wrong and start over

so at the start of every adventure

peering over the edge with you is where I want to be

that’s where you’ll find me

one foot in front of the other

here’s to hand in hand forever

cause you’ll still be running by my side

when the world falls to its knees

and we’ll still be dancing when the world has lost

the ability to hear

the symphony

can you hear the stars

they’re singing out our song

when you reach for me

The heavens sing along

can you hear my heart

pounding out a melody

that I belong with you

and you belong with me

fathers love for me

My Child,

You may not know me,
but I know everything about you.
Psalm 139:1

I know when you sit down and when you rise up.
Psalm 139:2

I am familiar with all your ways.
Psalm 139:3

Even the very hairs on your head are numbered.
Matthew 10:29-31

For you were made in my image.
Genesis 1:27

In me you live and move and have your being.
Acts 17:28

For you are my offspring.
Acts 17:28

I knew you even before you were conceived.
Jeremiah 1:4-5

I chose you when I planned creation.
Ephesians 1:11-12

You were not a mistake,
for all your days are written in my book.
Psalm 139:15-16

I determined the exact time of your birth
and where you would live.
Acts 17:26

You are fearfully and wonderfully made.
Psalm 139:14

I knit you together in your mother's womb.
Psalm 139:13

And brought you forth on the day you were born.
Psalm 71:6

I have been misrepresented
by those who don't know me.
John 8:41-44

I am not distant and angry,
but am the complete expression of love.
1 John 4:16

And it is my desire to lavish my love on you.
1 John 3:1

Simply because you are my child
and I am your Father.
1 John 3:1

I offer you more than your earthly father ever could.
Matthew 7:11

For I am the perfect father.
Matthew 5:48

Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand.
James 1:17

For I am your provider and I meet all your needs.
Matthew 6:31-33

My plan for your future has always been filled with hope.
Jeremiah 29:11

Because I love you with an everlasting love.
Jeremiah 31:3

My thoughts toward you are countless
as the sand on the seashore.
Psalms 139:17-18

And I rejoice over you with singing.
Zephaniah 3:17

I will never stop doing good to you.
Jeremiah 32:40

For you are my treasured possession.
Exodus 19:5

I desire to establish you
with all my heart and all my soul.
Jeremiah 32:41

And I want to show you great and marvelous things.
Jeremiah 33:3

If you seek me with all your heart,
you will find me.
Deuteronomy 4:29

Delight in me and I will give you
the desires of your heart.
Psalm 37:4

For it is I who gave you those desires.
Philippians 2:13

I am able to do more for you
than you could possibly imagine.
Ephesians 3:20

For I am your greatest encourager.
2 Thessalonians 2:16-17

I am also the Father who comforts you
in all your troubles.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4

When you are brokenhearted,
I am close to you.
Psalm 34:18

As a shepherd carries a lamb,
I have carried you close to my heart.
Isaiah 40:11

One day I will wipe away
every tear from your eyes.
Revelation 21:3-4

And I'll take away all the pain
you have suffered on this earth.
Revelation 21:3-4

I am your Father, and I love you
even as I love my son, Jesus.
John 17:23

For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed.
John 17:26

He is the exact representation of my being.
Hebrews 1:3

He came to demonstrate that I am for you,
not against you.
Romans 8:31

And to tell you that I am not counting your sins.
2 Corinthians 5:18-19

Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled.
2 Corinthians 5:18-19

His death was the ultimate expression
of my love for you.
1 John 4:10

I gave up everything I loved
that I might gain your love.
Romans 8:31-32

If you receive the gift of my son Jesus,
you receive me.
1 John 2:23

And nothing will ever separate you
from my love again.
Romans 8:38-39

Come home and I'll throw the biggest party
heaven has ever seen.
Luke 15:7

I have always been Father,
and will always be Father.
Ephesians 3:14-15

My question is…
Will you be my child?
John 1:12-13

I am waiting for you.
Luke 15:11-32

Love, Your Dad
Almighty God

birthday girl

i am officially 20 years old

and i think i had the best birthday i've ever had

i am truly blessed

i got to wake up and spend the first part of my day with my Saviour and Lord.

He painted me a beautiful morning sunrise

His sun was shining brightly all day .

Just as the rays of sun finally broke through the clouds of many grey days,

so I felt his love shine on me and warm my spirit and soul.

i went on a beautiful walk outside with the man who is courting me,

and what a blessing he is

I went out for an awesome dinner with my family and boyfriend

then enjoyed cheesecake at home with them after

my birthday was completed at a pub in calgary with awesome friends

30 people from church came to spend time with me and celebrate my birthday

i'm so blessed and feel so loved.

i can't thank my God enough for his daily blessings, grace, and joy.

i also thank him for each and every person who is in my life

for the things i've learnt from their friendship.

and for knowing that I am never alone.

"Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth. Worship the Lord with gladness; come before him with joyful songs. Know that the Lord is God. It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people, the sheep of his pasture. Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations."

Psalm 100